Beginning

At the beginning
I sweat

The perspiration
Of anticipation

The fear of
Not Knowing
What’s to come

Pain grips my body
Clenches my teeth

As I imagine 
The maze ahead
Alone in the mystery

No one to help me
Find my way
Through this mess
Panic strikes my chest

I can’t think straight
See straight

I cannot take
The tiny steps
Required to set 
This thing in motion

Tiny steps feel
Like giant leaps
Beyond my reach

I stand, frozen

I fear starting
Because I don’t know
Where the ending is

I fear starting because
I haven’t started yet

I fear starting because
I can’t accept 
The imperfect way
I know I will 
Traverse this maze

I fear starting
Because….

The excuses 
Pour from my mind
Like a waterfall
Cementing inaction
Overwhelming my mind

I can’t think straight
I can’t see straight

So I take the first step
I begin

And the chaos 
In my mind
Slowly
Dies down